I haven’t really come out and called myself a Diabolist. This term Diabolist I reference in the terminology used by the host and co-host of the Black Flame Immersion podcast. However, I am leaning towards that term. I find it difficult to really label myself these days. Even calling myself Left-Hand path is a loaded term. Once it’s said someone has a mental construct of it and imposes that construct.
As these thoughts are floating through me today, I return to a previous podcast from the Black Flame Immersion (Ascension III):
It can be quite frustrating finding a defining label to identify with, but maybe that’s my problem. Maybe I don’t need any label. So when people ask me, “are you spiritual,” yes I certainly am… but they won’t understand it. But maybe I don’t need to explain to such people what I am.
Satanism: As the Host of the podcast says in that episode, Satanism is typically associated with the Church of Satan. The CoS tends to be an atheist organization and regardless if one is atheist or not, the path imposes a cosmology that pulls in the Judeo-Christian patterns that I’m trying to rid myself of.
I spent much effort to burn off the filters of the old paradigm of Christianity, the last thing I want to do is invert the Tree of Life and talk about the demons who invert the Hebrew angels. So even in the theistic Satanic paradigm there’s issues of Christian contamination, which I want nothing to do with.
Luciferian: When I read Michael Ford’s work, “Luciferian Witchcraft,” I found it to be reasonable up until it got int the Grimoire aspects. In the early part of the book he provides much Anthropological & historical data on the religions that came out of old world and how they transformed into what they are today.
Michael Ford also reveals his crux of magic formula, which I happen to be in agreement with: Will, Desire and Belief. These three, in my personal experience, produce the magical experience.
Yet with that knowledge, Ford focuses upon the Judeo-Christian ethos. He does offer some variants (such as the Person concept of Ahriman) and Tiamat, Pazuzu and others. Yet the core will return to “The book of Cain,” and the like, which again brings back the Christian mythos.
To his credit, Michael Ford (and other Luciferians) often differentiate Lucifer from the fallen angel of the Hebrew texts. Often this is treated as a biblical reference to a fallen king. The word Lucifer is Latin and of course Latin wasn’t in existence with the Hebrew Scriptures were written. For such Luciferians, Lucifer is a Roman deity.
Setian: When Michael Aquino broke away from Anton LaVey’s Church of Satan, he formed a new organization called the Temple of Set. I have much respect for the Temple of Set because of their high standards to research and PhD quality projects.
In my personal experience I found some amazing Setians… and some difficult ones. In the end I came to a conclusion about myself: I am not cut out for groups.
Why Groups Fail the Individual
To be a member of a group, one takes on the identity of the group. Every group will have barriers of belief. Anything beyond the barrier moves one outside of the groups philosophy, and this isn’t usually tolerated.
Even in the most accommodating groups people who chose to disagree on pivotal subjects will be dismissed, or even shunned. In more hostile groups, they will be addressed to conform.
If there were a group that didn’t do any shunning, nor any control, there is still voluntary control. This is when the aspiring Initiate presents themselves as something they aren’t in order to rise up through the ranks of the organization. They might even fool themselves.
In time however, the aspirants will get to a point where their goals are met. This is when the energy required for the facade becomes too much a burden, and they react. Reactions can vary, but often it starts as open bickering and turns into active rebellion.
All of this, in my opinion, is due to the pressures upon people to conform to group dynamics.
The Supreme Individual
The Host of the Black Flame Immersion describes Diabolist as one who is without a group. It is the seeker for personal gnosis. Such an individual is untouched by the faults described above.
This path of course has its own difficulties. Without someone to guide you, you may wonder into ego delusions of grander. I’ve met those people who show up to events and tell you they are the prophets of the new age, chosen by some deity itself.
But we needn’t fall to that extreme. Our sovereignty must be guided with rationality and reason. In this balance, no group mind is required. Teachings can be found through life itself, or spiritual advisers and material.
The quest here is Individual in nature. This requires more thinking, more time in personal seeking of truth. One must be willing to let go of anything holding them back.
When I made my initial oath on this path, I felt this mental thought, “agree to let go of anything holding you back.” I have met that condition and have let go of long time friends, old religions and the like.
This path is hard. Harder than most. We walk it alone and although we may speak one to another and offer each other advice, the only gain we get is in our own personal discover and experience.
Perhaps I should tell people who inquire on my beliefs that I’m a “Diabolist.” I wonder. But in truth I think it would open a conversation I would rather not engage in.
I’m a truth seeker. I’m a seeker of personal gnosis. I’m looking to secure my own essence as its pinnacle of Individuality. Not int he sense of dying my hair purple or sporting exotic piercings. Rather I’m talking about real Individuality, as stated, “…to have established completely self-referential continuity of consciousness as its own objective and independent reality.”1
First Change: was in letting go of my old feelings towards my old faith. I had to let that go. It wasn’t enough for me to simply deny the old faith, I had to desecrate and burn a bible given me by my parents. This wasn’t some token gesture, this was extremely challenging for me to do. This was the core of my identity, a life-long filter coloring my word was torn asunder.
That first change came about through my willingness to change. To be open to change.
Second Change: soon after I found a backbone I never had before. I disconnected from my mother, and a very old friend. These people were holding me back. In time I even let go (mentally) of my brothers. Everyone of them became so strange to me from this new starting point.
Third Change: I went from wanting to parrot the dress and tactics of many left hand path Initiates (coloring the work with sinister imagery) to seeking truth without the need of conforming in this way.
Fourth Change: from the beginning I was pondering a path in the Temple of Set. Through the application process, I found it to be a direct opposition to my own personal sovereignty. While I was putting in 100% in the process, the person grading my work gave maybe a flippant 5%. This is the power play of group dynamics. I realized I couldn’t allow this person to continue to lead me along like this – realizing the group as my various past group experiences, I wrote and asked to have the application process terminated.
Fifth Change: The name of Deity was no longer important to me. Where I appealed to the dark prince, I now worked with magic directly. No grimoire, no spell book, just me and my own Gnosis. I began to only interact with my Daemon, as anything else seemed hidden or non-existent. I’m a Theist, but yet I can’t explain this. I feel the force behind the LHP is mostly my Daemon and that, right now, is my focus of aligning the Daemon and my experience.
Sixth Change: Recently I’ve noticed a lack of interest in the concerns of others. Where occultist friends of mine are involved in politics and daily squabbles, I find I really don’t care as much. I’m even detached from people who are going through death and problems. Trying not to appear as a dick, I’m faking my concerns, but honestly I feel something is happening within me – and I’m slowly disentangling from the world around me.
To date, these are the changes in my personal system. I’m not saying I’m right, but I feel I’m right for me. This is my gnosis and each of us are responsible for finding that guiding truth principal – to being Free and Sovereign.